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"You're American? Oh, your husband must be from the Middle
East."
"But you weren't raised that way"
"You better watch out for those men, I saw that movie."
"But it's not you, I know you better"
"Why are you trying to look like an Arab?"
"It's the 90's, you don't have to dress that way,
modernize."
"Aren't you hot with all
those clothes on."
"That's Enough Already"
I am an American Christian raised
woman. At the age of 23 I started learning about Islam, and
eventually became Muslim (All thanks and praise to Allah).
As a teenager and on into my 20's, I always made sure I
looked my best, and actually I was voted best looking girl
by my senior high school class. Full face of make-up,
perfect hair, and always the clothes in trend. I had the
best looking sports car, a great paying job as a hair
designer, and I was always looking to have a good time. I
was an independent woman, and was never questioned about any
decisions I made, or criticized about anything I did.
When I became Muslim all that changed.
Suddenly every one had something to say, I heard it all. I
was no longer thought off as being able to use my adult mind
the same way again. I was brain-washed, or I was doing it to
please my husband. ("You can't change a person ." isn't that
a common saying?)
As a Christian, I was religious on
Sunday mornings for an hour, or when the lottery numbers
were being picked I would pray -"please God let me win", or
when a loved one was hurt I would try to make a deal with
God. And of course on holidays.
I am 28 now, and Islam is a way of
life, my way of living. Everything I do, every minute of my
day is now done differently. Especially, I pray 5 times a
day. Believe me, you can not pretend to be a Muslim. These
days I live a simple, peaceful, very moral life. I have no
stress, no worries. My husbands' duty is to make sure I'm
well cared for, and to provide for me. I am able to stay
home and take care of my son according to my standards, not
a baby-sitter's. I couldn't trade in his smiles for a pay
check, his smiles are my pay. I read, I sew, I relax, and I
have plenty of time to prepare fresh home cooked meals for
my family.
Oppressed ? Yes, I was oppressed last
week , when my cordless phone broke and I had to use a
regular one. I wouldn't change my life now for anything. And
if I was to divorce my husband, SURPRISE, I'm still going to
practice Islam in the same manner I do now.
So if you are a friend or a family
member of a convert to Islam, instead of being negative or
against it, try to understand and respect the persons new
way of life. And remember we are Islam. There is no question
that will embarrass nor offend us. These people who are
great scholars of Islam because they saw a movie, are not
the correct source of telling you about my life.
I saw a few movies about Italians, so
should I assume all Italian men are in the Mafia, deal
drugs, kill people, and have girl friends on the side? NO!
Believe me, I have a lot more to write
about my hardships and hassles of being a Muslim. None of
which pertains to the religion itself, but to what even
perfect strangers have said or done to me.
Oh yeah, did I mention I was also
voted MOST LIKELY TO SUCCEED by my high school senior
class.
I feel as though I have.
Signed,
A MUSLIM SISTER
Women in Islam
Women in
Islam are appreciated and highly respected, opposite to a
lot of misleading and incorrect information that are widely
spread among non-Muslims.
Qur'an has
highlighted the fact that men and women are equal in the
sight of God. According to the teachings of Islam, the only
thing that distinguishes people in the sight of God is their
level of God-consciousness and being pious. Moreover, the
Islamic Law has guaranteed rights to women over 1400 years
ago, whereas women in Western societies are now struggling
to obtain their rights.
For example, Islam considers the woman a full-person, the
spiritual equal of a male. Also, according to the Islamic
Law, women have the right to own property, operate a
business and receive equal pay for equal work. The woman in
Islam has total control of her wealth. She cannot be married
against her will.
Moreover, the woman in Islam has the right to inherit
property and has the right to get divorced if she doesn't
get good treatment from her husband, and can no longer stand
her life with him (yet she has to have a good reason). Also,
Islam does not look down on women nor consider them an "evil
temptress", and thus does not blame women for the "original
sin". Women in Islam participate in all forms of worship
same like men. Actually, the rights that Islam gave to women
over 1400 years ago were almost unheard of in the West until
the 1900's.
Fifty years ago, women in Western societies could not buy a
house or a car without the signature of the father or the
husband! Islam gives great respect to women and their vital
role in society. Also, it is noteworthy that the Prophet
Muhammad's mission stopped many of the vicious practices in
regards to women that were present in the society of his
time. For example, the Qur'an put an end to the pagan Arab
practice of killing their baby daughters when they were
born.
If women in the Muslim World today don't get their rights,
it is not because Islam did not grant them
If women in
the Muslim World today don't get their rights, it is not
because Islam did not grant them their rights, but because
of some alien traditions prevailing in many places that have
come to overshadow the teachings of Islam, either through
ignorance or through the impact of colonisation.
The Islam's respect to the women is crowned with the Hijab,
the veil, considered by a lot of anti-Muslims a symbol of
women's oppression and servitude. God ordered Muslim women
to wear the veil (to cover the whole of their body except
their face and their hands) to protect them.
The Qur'an makes it clear through many verses that the veil
obligatory and not an option for Muslim women (as some
misleading information state).
"O Prophet! Tell your wives and daughters and the women
of the believers to draw their cloaks (jalabib) close round
them (when they go abroad)..."
The Qur'an also shows how essential the veil is for modesty.
Modesty is prescribed to protect women from molestation.
Thus, the only purpose of the veil in Islam is protection.
The Islamic veil is not a sign of man's authority over the
woman, nor is it a sign of the woman's subjection to the
man, on the contrary it shows respect and care for the
woman.
Legitimate Mixing Between
Men and Women
Dr.Yusuf Al Qaradawy
Some words
which have existed in the language for a long time have
acquired new significance and even weight. Among these is
the term "mixing (or mingling)", which refers to mixing of
men and women in one place. During the Age of the Prophet
(blessings and peace he upon him), the Age of the Companions
which succeeded it, and the age of their followers, Muslim
men and women met at different gatherings, religious or
otherwise, and this was not forbidden at all. Under the
right circumstances and for good reasons, it was legitimate
and natural for them to meet. Nor was it called "mixing"
then.
In our age,
however, the word has become very common. Nor do I know when
it came into use with the new connotations unsavoury for
Muslim men and women, since mixing one thing with another
suggests a dissolution, the way sugar or salt is dissolved
in water, a metaphor that would have unpleasant suggestions
if applied to male-female relations. Anyway, the purpose is
to point out that not every kind of socialisation is
prohibited as some may imagine and as other hard-liners
argue. On the other hand, not all forms of mixing are
acceptable as propagators of Westernization claim.
In the
second volume of my book Contemporary Legal Opinions (Fataawa
Mu'aserah), I answer questions on this and several other
related matters such as greeting women, handshaking,
treatment of women by male doctors and the reverse, in
addition to other questions. A careful Muslim should refer
to these legal opinions if he or she wants to learn about
the rules of the Islamic teachings (sharīah). Here,
nevertheless, I would like to make the point that it is our
duty to adhere to the best guidance which is that of the
Prophet Mohammed (blessings and peace be upon him), his
righteous successors and enlightened Companions whose pious
paths he recommends sticking to, avoiding the two extreme
routes of Western permissiveness and severe Eastern
asceticism.
By
examining this guidance of the Prophet (blessings and peace
be upon him), we find that the woman was not caged or
isolated as happened later during the age of Muslim
abatement. The women attended the major congregational
prayers on Fridays at the Prophet's mosque, including the
night (Al-Esha) and dawn (Al-Fajr) prayers. The Prophet
(blessings and peace be upon him) would direct them to form
rows behind the mens rows, and the more to the back the
better so that they would not see the sensitive parts of
men's bodies that might have shown due to the fact that only a
few were familiar with trousers and underwear, and there was
no partition between the men and women.
Moreover,
in the early stages of congregating for prayer, men and
women would go through the same entrance where crowding
would occur. The Prophet (blessings and peace be upon him)
said, "If only we left this entrance to the women". [
Transmitted by Abu Dawud on the authority of Ibn Umar (462)
(463).] So they allocated the entrance for them from that
time on and it became known as the "women's entrance." As
for the Friday congregation, women during the Prophet's Era
attended the prayer and listened to the sermon to the extent
that one of them could learn the Surah of because the
Prophet (blessings and peace be upon him) recited it
frequently from his position on the sermon pulpit. They also
attended the two Bairam (a religious celebration)
congregations and took part in these big Islamic
celebrations that involved all people, old and young, male
and female, in the open outskirts where they would chant the
name of Allah. Um`Ateyya, a witness of the Prophet's Era,
said, "We were frequently instructed to go out for the
Bairams."
In another
version she said, "The Messenger of Allah (blessings and
peace be upon him) instructed us, the maids, and the ones in
their menses to go out. The women menstruating would stay
away from prayer and witness the good (of the day) and
Muslim's prayer (to Allah). So I said, `O Messenger of
Allah, there may be one of us who does not have a jilbab
(dress)." He replied, `Let her sister (in Islam) give her
one. [Sahih Muslim "The Prayers of the Two Eids" (890).]
This is one
of the aspects of Muslim life that are ignored by Muslims in
most of their countries. Some, however, such as the
devotional retreat in the last ten days of Ramadan and the
attendance of the Bairam congregation by women, are in the
process of coming back to life through the efforts of the
youth of the modern Islamic awakening.
Women
always attended the teaching sessions of the Prophet
(blessings and peace be upon him). They would address Aisha
with the questions they found awkward or too bold to ask.
The Prophet's wife, Įisha (may Allah be pleased with her),
praised the women of the Ansar whose shyness did not prevent
them from seeking knowledge of the religion and asking
questions about major issues such as impurity (full sex or
ejaculation preventing one from performing some forms of
worship), night ejaculation, washing from impurity,
menstruation and other such matters.
This,
however, was not enough for them compared to the men's
completely enfolding the Prophet (blessings and peace be
upon him); so they demanded a special day of teaching be
allocated to them without vying with a crowd of men, and
said openly, "Messenger of Allah, the men have taken
complete possession of your company, so devote one of your
days to us." The Prophet (blessings and peace be upon him)
promised to give them a day and he preached and gave them
instruction. [ Transmitted by Bukhari in The World (Al-Alam)
1/34 on the authority of Abu Said.] This kind of female
activism was also revealed during battles when women served
in the army with the mujahedeen (warriors who struggle to
keep Islam alive) in a way that suited them and brought out
the best of their abilities, such as attending the wounded,
giving medical aid, nursing the injured fighters, in
addition to cooking, procuring water and the like. Um `Ateyya
asserted, "I went on seven military expeditions with the
Prophet (greetings and peace be upon him); I would guard the
fighters, provisions, make their food, treat the injured and
nurse the ill ones". [Transmitted by Muslim (1812).]
Anas, one
of the Prophet's Companions, narrates, "On the Day of Uhud,
`Aisha and Um Salim, their sleeves rolled up, would carry
water in skin bags on their backs and empty the contents
into the soldiers open mouths". [Transmitted by Muslim
(1811).] The fact that `Aisha was still in her teens renders
incorrect the claim that female participation in military
expeditions and battles was confined to old women.
Realistically speaking, this defies logic, as such work
would be unduly onerous for
the aged when considering the physical and psychological
exigencies of war.
In the same
line, Imam Ahmad recalls, `six believing women were in the
army that besieged Khaibar, their task being to hand arrows
to the fighters, prepare food, procure water, treat the
wounded, spin yarn and help in (the promotion of) the cause
of Allah. Eventually, the Prophet (blessings and peace be
upon him) allocated shares in the spoils to them.
[Transmitted by Ahmad 51271,7/371; And Abu Dawud (2729).]
It is also
established that some of the Companion's wives took up arms
in some expeditions and battles. The deeds of Um `Imarah
Nasba bint Ka'b on the Day of Uhud are well known and were
of such effect as to make the Prophet say, "Her manner
excelled that of such and such people." On the day of the
Battle of Hunain, Um Salum, for her part, kept a dagger to
stab any enemies who would come within her reach. This story
is told again by her son Anas, "On the Day of Hunain, Um
Salum had a dagger; when she was seen by her husband, Abu
Talha, he told the Prophet, `Messenger of Allah, Um Salum is
keeping a dagger with her." When the Prophet asked her about
it she answered, `It is to stab the abdomen of any of the
Pagans who might come near me," at which the Prophet
laughed. [Transmitted by Muslim (1809).]
But the
women of the Prophet's and Companion's Eras had ambitions
that went beyond the participation in the expeditions into
adjacent areas. They were also keen to take part in the
Muslim conquests of distant lands to help disseminate the
message of Islam. Anas narrated, "One day, the Prophet
(blessings and peace be upon him) took his siesta in the
house of Urn Hiram. When he woke up, he laughed. So she
asked, `What makes you laugh, Prophet of Allah?" The Prophet
said, `I have seen some people from my nation, who were out
to fight for the sake of Allah, riding the sea. There were
kings seated on their thrones." So she replied, `O Messenger
of Allah, pray to Allah that I may be one of them." He did.
[Sahih Muslim (1912)] During the reign of `Uthman (the third
caliph), Um Hiram set sail with her husband, Ubada ibn As-Samit,
to Cyprus, where she was killed while she was on horseback
(in a battle) and was buried there, according to biographers
and chroniclers. A whole section is devoted to highlighting
woman's roles in the battles and military expeditions.
In the
sphere of social life, the Muslim woman played her part,
preaching of good deeds, enjoining what is right and
forbidding evil, in conformity with Allah's statement: "The
believers, men and women are "Auliya" (helpers, supporters,
friends, protectors) of one another, they enjoin (on the
people) what is right Al-Ma`ruf (i.e. Islamic Monotheism and
all that Islam orders one to do), and forbid (people) from
Al-Munkar (i.e. polytheism and disbelief of all kinds, and
all that Islam has forbidden). [Surah 9:71]
A
well-known story depicts a woman reasoning with `Umar (may
Allah be pleased with him) in the mosque over the issue of
the amount of bridal money paid to the bride. It also
illustrates how `Umar (the third caliph), being convinced of
her argument, reversed his opinion to that of hers in
public. His comment on this was "everybody's knowledge is
better than mine". [Tafsir Ibn Kathir 1/468] The story is
cited by no less an authoritative register than Ibn Kathir's
Tafsir, where Ibn Kathir states its ascription to `Umar is
correct. In another version `Abdul-Raziq cites `Umar as
saying about himself, "A woman debated with `Umar and outdid
him in the debate. [ Tafsir Ibn Kathir 7/180] Also during
his caliphate, `Umar appointed a woman, Al-Shifa bint
Abdullah as the market-place superintendent.
By
examining the Qur'an's discourse on woman's affairs and by
looking onto the lives of the Prophets, we hardly find such
an iron curtain, as is drawn by some people, between men and
women. Thus in the prime of his youth, Prophet Moses (peace
be upon him) is depicted talking to the two daughters of the
old man of Madyan. He asks them questions and gets their
answers without any particular feeling of guilt or
embarrassment and magnanimously helps them. One of them
returns soon after with an invitation from her father for
Moses to come to their house. One of them even suggests her
father hire Moses, as he is a strong and honest man.
This is how
the Quran puts
it: "And when he arrived at the water of Midian (Madyan) he
found there a group of men watering (their flocks), and
beside them he found two women who were keeping back (their
flocks). He said, "What is the matter with you?" They said,
"We cannot water (our flocks) until the shepherds take
(their flocks). And our father is a very old man." So he
watered (their flocks) for them, then he returned back to
shade, and said: "My Lord? Truly, lam in need of whatever
good you bestow upon me!" Then there came to him one of the
two women, walking shyly. She said: "Verily, my father calls
you that he may reward you for having watered (our flocks)
for us." So when he came to him and narrated the story, he
said: "Fear you not. You have escaped from the people who
are Zalimun (polytheists, disbelievers, and wrongdoers)."
And said one of them (the two women): "O my father! Hire
him! Verily, the best of men for you to hire is the strong,
the trustworthy. [Sūrah 28:23- 26]
In the
story of Mary, every time Zachariah comes to her chamber he
finds much food, so he inquires about it:
" Every time he entered Al-Mihrab [A praying place or
private room.] (to visit) her, he found her supplied with
sustenance. He said: "O Mary! From where have you got this?"
She said: "From Allah" Verily Allah provides sustenance to
whom he wills, without limit. [Sūrah 3:37]
Another
story is that of the Queen of Sheba, who is cited by the
Qur'an as consulting her people about how they should
respond to Solomon's message to her: "She said, "O chiefs!
Advise me in (this) case of mine. I decide no case till you
are present with me." They said: "We have great strength,
and great ability for war, but it is for you to command; so
think over what you we command." She said: "Verily! Kings,
when they enter a town (country), they despoil it, and make
the most honourable amongst its people low. And thus they
do. [Sūrah 27:32- 34]
Later then
she arrives in Solomon's palace, she converses with Solomon
as follows:
" So when she came, it was said (to her): "Is your throne
like this?" She said: "(It is) as though it were the very
same." And (Solomon said): "Knowledge was bestowed on us
before her, and we were submitted to Allah (in Islam as
Muslims before her)." And that which she used to worship
besides Allah has prevented here (from Islam), for she was
of a disbelieving people. It was said to her: "Enter As-Sarh"
(a glass surface with water underneath it), but when she saw
it, she thought it was a pool, and she (tucked up her
clothes) uncovering her legs, Solomon said: "Verily, it is
Sarh paved smooth with slab of glass." She said: "My lord!
Verily, I have wronged myself, and I submit (in Islam,
together with Solomon), to Allah, the Lord of `Alamn
(mankind, jinns, and all that exists). [ Sūrah 27:42 to 44]
Nor is it
right to say that the revealed codes of preceding nations do
not apply to us, since their stories were only cited in the
Qur'an for reflection and guidance. Hence the correctness of
the claim that the revealed code of preceding nations which
is given in the Qur'an and the Sunna (traditions of the
Prophet Mohammed) is also a code for us as long as no code
of ours renders it null. Allah said to his Messenger:" They
are those whom Allah had guided. So follow their guidance".
[Sūrah 6:90]
Moreover,
the fact that in the early stage of Islam the initially
revealed punishment for a woman who committed adultery was
to confine her to a house until she died or until Allah made
a way out for her: "And those of your woman who commit
illegal sexual intercourse, take the evidence of four
witnesses from amongst you against them; and if they
testify, confine them (i.e. women) to houses until death
comes to them or Allah ordains for them some (other) way. [Sūrah
4:15] meaning it is illogical from the point of view of the
Qur'an, and Islam in general, to make house-confinement a
characteristic of a decent and chaste Muslim woman, which
would be to punish her without any perpetration. Later, of
course, the punishment changed to flogging for the unmarried
couple who commit adultery and stoning to death for the
married ones
In
summation, the encounter of men and women is not prohibited
in itself. Quite the contrary, it is allowable or even
required if done in pursuit of a noble cause like gaining
knowledge or performing
good acts in which the joint efforts of both men and women
are necessary.
Pseudo-arguments for
unrestricted mixing
This is the
position of Islam on man-woman relations, and their common
involvement on charitable and righteous lines is what we
call legitimate mixing; yet "intellectual imperialism" has
managed to create in our countries people who turn a deaf
ear to the ruling of Allah and His Messenger. These people
call on us to give the woman free rein to assert herself,
promote her personality, enjoy her life and her femininity.
They want her to mix with men freely, experience them
closely where they would be together and alone, travel with
them, go to cinemas or dance till midnight together. She is
supposed to find the "right man" from all those she has
known. In this way, it is said, life is supposed to be more
secure and have greater stability in the face adversity.
These
people who may well be thinking of themselves as unblemished
seraphs, tell us not to worry about the man or woman as a
result of this "decent" communication, innocent friendship
and upright contact. The frequency of their contact will
pacify desire. The two sexes will supposedly find
satisfaction in the mere look, conversation or, in the
extreme, dancing together, which is only a form of elevating
artistic impression. Sensual pleasure would have no place.
It is a clean vent for energy, nothing more. This is said to
be what the advanced West did after they rid themselves of
complexes and privation.
Pseudo-arguments disproved
In answer
to this line of thinking, we must say that we are Muslims
first and foremost. We do not sell our religion in imitation
of the vagaries of Westerners or Easterners. Our religion
forbids us from promiscuous mixing with its showiness and
seductiveness: "Then we have put you (O Mohammed, blessings
and peace be upon him) on a plain way of (Our) commandment
like the one We commanded Our messengers before you (i.e.
legal ways and laws of the Islamic Monotheism). So follow
you that (Islamic Monotheism and its laws), and follow not
the desires of those who know not. Verily, they can avail
you nothing against Allah (if He wants to punish you). [Sūrah
45:18]
" Verily,
the Zalimun (polytheists, wrongdoers, etc.) are "Auliya"
(protectors, helpers, etc.) to one another, but Allah is the
Wali (Helper, Protector, etc.) of the Muttaqun [i.e. pious
and righteous persons who fear Allah much (abstain from all
kinds of sin and evil deed which He has forbidden) and love
Allah much (perform all kinds of good deeds which He has
ordained.)]" [Surah 45:18-19]
In
addition, the West itself, enamoured by these ideas, is
suffering the consequences of dissipation and decaying
morality that has corrupted its youth and doomed its
civilisation to ruin and collapse. In the United States, in
Sweden, and in other countries where sexual freedom is the
norm, statistics show that feverish lust is not alleviated
by freedom of talk and contact, nor by whatever may follow
that. On the contrary, the more people taste, the thirstier
they become.
It would be
better if we studied the consequences of this freedom or
what may as well be termed looseness and abandonment of
virtues and traditions in modern civilised Western
societies.
Effects of promiscuous
mixing
Numbers and
events that fill statistics and reports provide a more
convincing indictment of this point. Sexual freedom and the
sexual revolution has borne its bitter fruit with the
dissolution of the barriers separating men and women and the
resultant effects are set forth as follows.
Moral decay
The
consequences of sexual promiscuity have been the
disintegration of morality characterised by the tyranny of
desire and the triumph of bestiality over humanity, the loss
of sense of chastity and any sense of shyness and reserve by
both men and women giving rise to an internally disturbed
society. In a famous speech in 1962, President Kennedy said
that American young people were loose, indulgent and
decadent; six out of seven young men were not fit to join
the army because they were up to their ears in lustfulness.
He warned against the ills of such youth leading the
country.
In a book
by the Harvard Research Centre director, entitled The Sexual
Revolution, the author firmly states the United States is
heading towards a catastrophic situation of sexual anarchy,
akin to that of the Romans and Greeks. He adds that
Americans are beset the by dangers of sexual intemperance
that would overwhelm their culture and all aspects of their
life.
While the
communists were more reticent on these matters, and general
restrictions existed on media coverage, in 1962, Khrushchev
declared that the Soviet youth had deviated and had been
spoilt by luxury. He threatened to open concentration camps
in Siberia to rid the society of the decadent youth that
posed a threat to the future of the Soviet Union.
Illegitimate children
The rapid
increase in the numbers of illegitimate children is directly
related to the unlimited rein given to desire and the
removal of barriers between young men and women. Statistics
on the ratio of pregnant school girls in the United States
revealed dreadful dimension. In a newspaper report, one
third of the infants born in 1983 were illegitimate. Most of
them were born to young women under nineteen. The total
number of illegitimate children was 112,353 with a
percentage of 37% of the births for that year.
Drop in Marriage Rates
The
availability of sex without any liability of marriage and
family has led youth take the route of spending their youth
between different partners, enjoying change without
commitment to a "monotonous life" and without having to
provide the costs of a responsible married life and the
liabilities of fatherhood. Thus a huge number of young women
are deprived of the opportunity to have a husband, and
settle with a modicum of peace and security, because of the
illicit yearnings of easy relationships. Similarly, there
are a lot of young men who are also deprived of a peaceful
life. Statistics published in the United States show, for
the first time since the beginning of the century, the
majority of the inhabitants of San Francisco are celibate;
fifty-three per cent are not married. For Bruce Chapman, who
announced the findings, this was probably an indication of
the obsolescence of the traditional family pattern. He added
that these social changes were good for the welfare of the
city which had witnesses a forty per cent increase in the
number of youth between twenty-five and thirty-four during
the previous ten years. This, however, did not include the
homosexuals of the city who constitute fifteen per cent of
the population.
In the face
of the sexual degradation which is a predominant social
phenomena on the Western world, it was natural for Swedish
women to stage a 100,000-woman demonstration in protest
against unlimited sexual freedom. It must have been woman's
institutes and awareness of their future life and where
their interests lie that motivated them to organise such a
huge protest.
High Divorce Rates and
Destruction of the Family
Not only is
marriage beset by many obstacles, it is also unsafe after
its accomplishment. The family collapses and bonds break
with occurrence of the slightest problem. In all Western countries,
divorce rates are skyrocketing.
Spread of Lethal Diseases
The
outbreak of sexually transmitted diseases, as well as
neurotic, mental and psychological diseases, the spread of
complexes and disturbances that claim hundreds of thousands
of patients are among the acknowledged effects of sexual
promiscuity. One of the most dangerous, and in many cases
lethal diseases is AIDS, which is caused by the HIV virus.
This virus is responsible for the body's loss of immunity
leaving it vulnerable to all factors of decay. Millions of
people have succumbed to this menace, a fact that provides a
modern piece of evidence for the words of the Prophet
Mohammed (blessings and peace be upon him) that, "Lechery
never appears in a community, but with its proclamation,
plague and affliction appear throughout, which did not exist
in bygone generations". [ Tranmitted by Ibn Majah on the
authority of Ibn Umar (4019) ; Al-Zawa'ed, Hadith Sahih; and
Al-Hakim and Al Dhahaby 4/540, 541 and others.]
Notwithstanding the neurosis and psychological disturbances
which have taken Western societies by storm and have filled
hospitals and asylums with patients.
Freud and
his followers in psychoanalysis argued that the lifting of
traditional restrictions on sexual instincts would relieve
the nerves and consciousness, undo complexes and give souls
a sense of comfort and ease. The restrictions have been
lifted, the desires have been released and the complicated
souls are only worse off; nerves are tenser and anxiety is
the disease of the age. Not even the opening of a million
clinics have helped.
It is hard
to believe this is the picture the proponents of
unrestricted mixing would like to see of us when Allah has
protected us against its evils. Or is it only (that they do
not know?
The Woman as Mother
The first
contact with a woman is with one's mother, who suffers in
the pregnancy, delivery, nursing and rearing of her child.
History
does not recall a religion or a system which honours the
woman as a mother and which raises her as Islam does. Islam
repeatedly commends the woman, and this comes directly after
the command to worship and believe in the Oneness of Allah.
Allah has made honouring one's mother a virtue, and He puts
forth the mother's right over that of the father for what
she endures in pregnancy, delivery, nursing and raising her
children. This is stated and restated in the Qur'an, in
multiple chapters, to imprint this notion in the child's
mind and heart as per the following verses: "And we have
enjoined on man (to be dutiful and good) to his parents. His
mother bore him in weakness and hardship upon weakness and
hardship, and his weaning is in two years-give thanks to Me
and your parents,-unto Me is the final destination. [Surah
31:14] and "And We have enjoined on man to be dutiful and
kind to his parents. His mother bears him with hardship and
she brings him forth with hardship, and the bearing of him,
and the weaning of `jim is thirty (30) months. [Surah 46:15]
A man came
to the Prophet (blessings and peace be upon him) asking,
"Who is most deserving of my care?" He said, "Your mother."
The man asked, "Then who?" He said, "Your mother." The man
asked, "Then who?" He said, Your mother." The man asked (the
fourth time), "Then who?" He said, "Your father. [
Transmitted by Bukhari and Muslim on the authority of Abu
Huraira The Pearl and the Coral (Al-Lu'lu' wal-Marjan)
(1652)]
Al-Bazzar
recounts that a man was circumambulating the Ka'bah carrying
his mother. The Prophet (blessings and peace be upon him)
asked him, "Have you repaid her?" The man said, "No, not
even for one of her moans (i.e. one of the moans of labour,
delivery and so on)
[Transmitted by Al-Bazzar (1872)]. As to being good to her,
it means treating her well, respecting her, humbling oneself
in front of her, obeying her without disobeying Allah,
seeking her satisfaction and pleasure in all matters, even
in a holy war. If it is optional, he must have her
permission, for being good to her in a type of jihad. [Jihad
is the struggle (physical, mental, psychological, spiritual,
etc.) to preserve the purity and practice of Islam.
(editor's note)]
A man came
to the Prophet (blessings and peace be upon him) and said,
"O Messenger of Allah, I want to fight and I want your
advice." He asked him, "Have you a mother?" The man said,
"Yes." He said, "Do not leave her because Paradise is under
her feet. [ Transmitted by Al-Nisaai, 6/11; Ibn Majah, 1/278
and Al-Hakim. It is amended and approved by Al-Dhahaby,
4/151, on the authority of Muaaweya Ibn Jammah.]
Some
religious laws before Islam neglected the mother's
relations, making them insignificant. With the advent of
Islam, it recommended caring for uncles and aunts, both on
the father's side and the mother's. A man approached the
Prophet (blessings and peace be upon him) and said, "I
committed an offence, could I atone for it?" He asked, "Have
you got a mother?" The man said, "No." He asked, "Have you
got a maternal aunt?" The man said, "Yes." The Prophet
(blessings and peace be upon him) said, "Be good to her. [
Transmitted by Termithy in "Righteousness and Relations"
(1905); Ibn Hibban Charity (EI-Ehsan) (435); and Al-Hakim
who amended it on the terms of the two Sheikhs, agreed upon
by Al-Dhahaby, 4/155, all on the authority of Umar.]
It is
amazing that Islam commanded us to be good to a mother even
though she is an unbeliever! Asma'a bint Abu Bakr asked the
Prophet (blessings and peace be upon him) about her
relationship to her unbelieving mother who had come to her.
He said, "Yes, be on good terms with your mother".
[Transmitted on the authority of Asmaa (agreed upon), The
Pearl and the Coral (Al-Lu'lu' wal-Marjan) (587).]
An
indication that Islam cares for motherhood, for the rights
of mothers and their feelings is that a divorced mother has
greater rights and is worthier of looking after her children
than the father. `Abdallah ibn `Amr ibn Al-as transmitted
that a woman asked,
"O
Messenger of Allah, this son of mine had my womb as a
container, my breasts for drinking, my lap to contain him.
His father has taken him from me." The Prophet (blessings
and peace be upon him) said, "You have more right if you do
not marry". [Transmitted by Ahmad in Al Musnad (6707).
Sheikh Shaker said its authenticity is correct. Transmitted
also by Abu Dawud.]
Imam Al-Khataby
said in Landmarks of Traditions (Maalem As-Sunna):
"Container" is the name of the place that contains a thing.
This means that the mother is worthier as she and the father
shared in the begetting of the child, then she was singled
out for such things as nursing which the father had no share
in. Therefore she deserves to be the first when it comes to
disputes about the child.
On the
authenticity of Ibn `Abbas who said, "`Umar ibn Al-Khattab
divorced his wife from Al-Ansar, the mother of `Asim. He met
her carrying the child in Mahser (a market- place between
Quba and Medina). The child was weaned and could walk. `Umar
held out his hand to take the child from her and disputed
about it till the boy cried out in pain. `Umar said, "I am
worthier of my son than you "They complained to Abu Bakr,
whose verdict was that the mother should keep the child. He
said, "Her scent, her bed, and her lap are better for him
than yours until he grows up and chooses for himself ". [
Landmarks of Traditions (Maalem as-Sunna) (2181).]
The mother
who is cherished that much by Islam and given all these
rights has a task to perform. She has to take care of her
children, raise them well, implant virtues, and make them
loathe evil. She has to teach them to obey Allah, encourage
them to defend what is truthful, not dissuade them from
fighting for the sake of Allah (one form of jihad) because
of the motherly sentiments in her heart
but to favour the correct way over sentiment.
We saw a
believing mother, Al-Khansaa, in the Battle of Qadesseyah
eloquently urging her four sons to be brave and steadfast.
Then as soon as the battle was over and the news of their
four deaths came to her, she did not wail and carry on but
said with certainty and contentment, "Praise be to Allah who
honoured me with their martyrdom for His faith."
Immortal mothers
Out of
Qur'anic guidance, we have been supplied wit superb examples
of good mothers who had influence and position in the
history of the faith in Allah. Moses" mother, for example,
responded to Allah's inspiration and calling when she cast
the apple of her eye into the river, assured of Allah's
promise: "And We inspired the mother of Moses, (saying):
`suckle him (Moses), but when you fear for him, then cast
him into the river and fear not, nor grieve. Verily! We
shall bring him back for you, and shall make him one of
(Our) Messengers." [Sūrah 28:7]
There is
also Mary's mother, who promised what she had in her womb to
be devoted to Allah, to be pure of any polytheism or worship
of anything other than Allah. She prayed to Allah to accept
her vow: "so accept (this), from me. Verily, You are the
All-Hearer, the All-Knowing". [Sūrah 3:35] When the child
turned out to be a female, which she had not expected, it
did not prevent her from fulfilling her vow, asking Allah to
protect her from all evil: "and I seek refuge with You
(Allah) for her and for her offspring from Satan, the
outcast" [Sūrah 3:36]
Moreover,
the Qur'an has made Mary (may Allah be pleased with her),
daughter of `Imran and mother of the Prophet Jesus (peace be
upon him), an example of purity, humility to Allah and of
faith in His word. "And Mary, the daughter of `Imran who
guarded her chastity; and We breathed into (the sleeve of
her shirt or her garment) through Our "Ruh" (i.e. Gabriel),
and she testified to the truth of the Words of her Lord
(believed in the Words of Allah "Be! and he was; that is
Jesus-son of Mary;-as a Messenger of Allah), and (also
believed in) His Scriptures, and she was of the Qanitun
(i.e. obedient to Allah). [Sūrah 66:12]
Source:
Witness-Pioneer
http://www.witness-pioneer.org/vil/Books/Q_WI/women_men.htm
Additional articles:
http://www.jannah.org/sisters/
http://www.usc.edu/dept/MSA/humanrelations/womeninislam/
http://www.modernmuslima.com/
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